heart“Oh, that I were as in months past, as in the days when God watched over me; when His lamp shone upon my head, and when by His light I walked through darkness; as I was in the days of my autumn youth, when the friendly counsel of God was over my tent; when the Almighty was still with me, when my children were around me; when my steps were bathed in butter, and the rock poured out rivers of oil for me!”

Holy Spirit, Your word says, “Know this: In the last days perilous times will come. Men will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, without natural affection, trucebreakers, slanderers, unrestrained, fierce, despisers of those who are good, traitors, reckless, conceited, lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God, having a form of godliness, but denying its power. Turn away from such people.” I come to the throne room and seek mercy; I seek to be given strength back to face each day. I like Job, understand lost and heartache. I also head the words You inspired Paul to write foretelling of our world as it currently is. No generation has experience all of what he wrote until now. I pray as a person completely broken and sometimes at lost of how to continue to fight, to even just breathe. I live in such a perverse world and I work among people who see evil as good and good as evil or mundane. I live in a world where the church has been silenced because of its failure to unite and keep sin out of its congregation and leaders. We have become the laughing stock or whipping boy for Satan because we no longer claim what sin is and live righteously. We have become like the world instead of giving it an alternative. 

Holy Spirit my heart grieves for the loss of my son Philip, for downfall and failure of many people I put faith and trust in that were supposed to be ministers under You. My heart is broken for the all the heartache I see and can do nothing about. For how my country, which was originally built on a foundation of belief in You and Your statutes, has strayed to the point we look like Sodom and Gamora. We no longer demonstrate hope, to a world where hate, greed, lust and foolishness reigns freely. We celebrate sin as freedom instead of as the slavery it truly is. For once in my life I think I can have a small glimpse of how Joseph felt when he was falsely cast into prison. 

I lift up my eyes to the hills—where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth. He will not let your foot slip—he who watches over you will not slumber; indeed, he who watches over Israel will neither slumber nor sleep. The Lord watches over you—the Lord is your shade at your right hand; the sun will not harm you by day, nor the moon by night. The Lord will keep you from all harm—he will watch over your life; the Lord will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore. I wait for the Lord, my soul waits, And in His word I do hope. My soul waits for the Lord more than those who watch for the morning—yes, more than those who watch for the morning, even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast. Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you. Show me the way I should go, for to you I lift up my soul.

Holy Spirit help me to draw strength from the words You inspired Paul to write: “I pray that the eyes of my heart may be enlightened in order that I may know the hope to which he has called me, the riches of his glorious inheritance in his holy people, and what is the exceeding greatness of His power toward us who believe, according to the working of His mighty power which He worked in Christ when He raised Him form the dead and seated Him at His right hand in the heavenly places, far above all principality and power and might and dominion, and every name that is named, not only in this age but also in that which is to come. And He put all things under His feet and gave Him to be head over all things to the church, which is His body, the fullness of Him who fills all in all.” Help me to stand, breathe and renew the hope You gave me at my point of accepting salvation. Help me to find joy so that I have strength once again stand, build Your kingdom, and serve You as You give me wisdom and direction. Amen. 

[Job 29:1-6; 2Timothy 3:1-5; Psalm 121; Psalms 130:5&6; Psalms 139:10; Psalms 143:8; Ephesians 1:18—23]